Figi Poisen Kills Hundreds

Figi has begun to revolt against the Penguins in the most imaginative way imaginable! They have poisened the Figi Island Spring water with a special chemical that is leathal to Penguins, but harmless to everything else, unfortunatly, the poisen tastes like shit, and they will hopefully be taken down from the inside by a secret spy who will put a pinch on salt in the water to enhance the awfulness of the taste. More will be disclosed later, and in the meantime, boycott the FIgi Water and it's evil ways!

Trouble with the UN

Not again. The UN has turned on us, partly because they want the power for themselves and partly because the Penguins did not promise tax breaks. Nothing is more anoying than having to buy loyalty. Thats why I'm a valued asset to the Penguin's plan, At least, that's what I was told by General Huggles.

On the subject of global warming....

Yes, glogal warming is a sad and unfortunate event that effects even the Penguin's everyday lives. Most Penguin's in the faculty agree on a National ban on cars, cole plants, and other green house gas expelling things, but not everyone is happy. The Purist Penguins ( talked about here http://penguinknews.blogspot.com/2006/03/types-of-penguins.html )
Say that cars are a nifty way to go about, and that the Bahamahs are better than the South Pole anyway. This is causing serious doubts among the Penguin Civilians about world domination.

" I't sound's like an awful lot of work." Says one. " I mean, I have a wife and two kids and that's responsibility enough for me, what are we going to do woth the entire planet? "

" For hundreds of years, we Penguins have kept to ourselves, and for good reason."
Much worry is spreading around the Penguin faculty, but General Huggles assured us that he had peacefull means of settling them down.